a sudden holiday shock.

Thats what i've been in the past week. i look up and before i know it,
Thanksgiving was here and gone! its' now december 1st! And theres only a couple weeks till christmas! right after that is new years. it's so crazy how time goes by so fast. the end of this year has definetly been a blur to me. as everyone enters into their holiday cheeriness, i just cant seem to find myself doing that. With thanksgiving, i can see how i cant find myself getting into that. i mean you're supposed to be surrounded by all of your family; but that didnt happen and defenitly will never happen for me. dont get me wrong, im thankful for things, im just not in that jovial holiday mood.
And for Christmas, i mean i wasnt copmletly oblivious to the fact it was coming up; im in choir and we've been singing christmas music since like august or september. i'm just not getting into any good cheeriness kind of stuff. i just get kinda down during the holidays because my dad's not there, this is the second holiday season i've had without him. it definetly makes a really big difference :/maybe its for the best? i can just focus on the real reason... God's birth.
New years is kind of just a reality check. Going into a new year i definetly want to leave behind all of the crap that has happened this year and just start fresh. but thats how it is EVERY new years; it ends up working for a while and then slowly it fades and your back on that normal schedule of stupidity. its kind of depressing when you look into it really. So for this new year i will definetly be relying on God with all my strength to get me through.

i have a blog now!

like everybody else!!!
how original :)
hmm.. well i will come up with some random things to write about sooner or later to entertain you all.